Friday, January 25, 2013

Judging Others


JUDGING OTHERS: This has been a discussion topic of late. When I hear someone make a blatant judgment of someone else, it immediately makes me narrow my eyes and look at them twice. Whether it is about race, religion, sexuality, life choices, or daily choices, it really is all the same. Personally, I think getting through life is really hard. My perspective on life has changed so much over the years that I typically assume that it is possible that an experience I have not yet had, may change my opinion. I have learned to never assume anything. I have so much work that I need to do on myself; I don't even dare to venture a guess on what someone else should do with their life. I have made so many mistakes and stumbled so many times. I have been reckless, and careless, and I have gone against the grain. I am a pretty sharp cookie, and even though I may be able to make a witty statement about something, I am a really good judge of what is not my business or place. Who am I to judge someone else? It is an awfully prideful thing to profess to know all the answers. I do a poor enough job when I am living in my life; I would never suppose to know better about someone else's journey than they do. My job in this world is to learn from what it shows me, and be the best me I can offer the world. I am not sure what it is about people who feel it is their life’s mission to set the world straight on how things should be, but it is likely that they are spending a lot of time avoiding serious issues in their own life. I feel sadness for them that they are not brave enough to shine a light on their own darkness.

Here is what I think.

~ I like color, all colors. In nature, the variety of colors in wildflowers is one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen. So is it with people.
~ I look for the special in everything. Sometimes special doesn't come in a tidy package, but that takes nothing away from the gift.

~ Creativity is the energy of life. I love authentic, unique people. My challenge has been to appreciate the seemingly average person. It is a challenge I accept.

~ There is nothing that is less of other people's business that who you choose to share your body with. Sexuality is a complicated part of our psyche, and seriously not the business of anyone else. Shame on those who even begin to comment on other people’s sex lives.

~ Everyone you come into contact with, each day, is going through something. It may be big or small. It may be current, or deep seeded. Being a human is hard. Being a good human is even harder. Even if I can't see life from a person's perspective, I try to simply assume that it has been a challenge and have compassion for that unseen challenge.

~ Not everyone is in the same place you are. It would be nice if everything happened when you thought you were ready for it, but that may not be the timing in someone else's life.

~ Other people's relationships are also none of anyone's business but the people involved. It is a delicate dance to partner in this life. Nothing is every one sided or simple for the people who are in it. How in the world would someone outside the situation be better informed? Support people struggling by listening, sharing a relevant story from your experience in your life, and assure them that you know they will make the choice they believe is right, and that if they find that they were wrong, you believe in their ability to right the wrong.

~ Freedom of religion is a choice that in America we are blessed to have. Many sins have been committed in the name of or behind the shroud of religious right. Many blessings, kindness and wonderful acts have come from the same belief system. Your heart and actions are what make you in this world. No other person can truly know your spirituality. It is not visible on the outside. Don’t be that guy that uses religion to validate anything other than human compassion. That guy is a jerk.

~ There are certain things in this world that are beyond judgment. Truth: and truth has no color. Kindness: and kindness has no shape. Faith: and faith has no dress code. Love: and love has no bounds.

Be your own Truth. Show Kindness to everything on this lovely earth. Have Faith in humanity, and that includes you. Love, even when it hurts.

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